By Michaela van Beinum
Deep breath in
you’re okay,
it was a really testing
and trying day
The world is on fire
this we have known
to calm the flame
we must stay home
Creation is calling
and so is my heart
my 9 – 5 job is
tearing me apart
A sea of grey
corridors of white
empty halls and empty words
haunt me at night
In the day I dream
of what it could be
the engineering life
for the ‘she’s’ after me
I don’t want them to cry
or change what they wear
to be more like the men
under 30 with grey hair
This purpose fills my heart
and breaks it all the same
for I get so tired
manoeuvring this game
What does it look like?
Does it shine does it smell?
I know how it will feel
making light amongst hell
A mural? A painting?
My usual way?
Should I leave? Should I quit?
Something tells me to stay
Is it money?
Is it power?
I can’t answer
I don’t know
Crazy thoughts fill my head
I should leave and be free
but I can always feel
the girl after me
‘Be the role model you wish you had’
a deep breath of release
I want to make a difference
for girls just like me
To empower others
I must first empower myself
move with purpose
move with grace
prioritise your health
Both physical and mental
in times like these
A Monday night poem,
in isolation, COVID-19